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  •  讀書369 >> 名著茶館 >> 美文閱讀>>正文
    《我的前半生》:羅子君錯了嗎?中國的全職主婦時代已然到來

      一面是隨著中國社會的發展而日漸壯大的全職主婦大軍,另一面卻是社會輿論依然在宣揚傳統落后的舊觀念,認為全職主婦是不學無術的黃臉婆與社會寄生蟲,對全職主婦呈現出一面倒的唱衰聲音,這實在是一個非常奇怪的現象。

      電視劇《我的前半生》播出之后,有一個社會群體在這段時間被輿論壓得抬不起頭來,那就是“全職主婦”。微信朋友圈中長時間被這樣的聲音霸屏:“女人得有自己的事業”“一定要有自己的工作,掙多掙少無所謂!”“有陣子我很糾結,自己一點都不喜歡如同雞肋一樣的工作,要不要全職在家?還好挺過來了,女人不能失去自我!”

    全職主婦時代的到來

      而與這種聲音極其不和諧的,是以下一組數據:2014年,一家中國大陸女性移動社區辣媽幫推出的《中國全職太太調查報告》顯示,近年來全職太太呈上升的趨勢,全職太太比例高達26%。CNN在2010年針對中國各地2萬名女性的一項調查也顯示,有40%被調查者表示希望當家庭主婦,只有38%想成為職業女性。與此同時,在中國北京海淀區的一所公立重點小學,一個班35名孩子家長中,有16個都是全職媽媽。

      一個不容忽視的現實是:當下中國傳統的雙職工家庭模式正在悄然改變。

      全職媽媽的增多,首要原因是教育理念的轉變。中國教育由全面依賴學校教育逐漸轉向更多個性化需求,對母親所扮演的角色也提出了更高的要求,需要家長的更多參與互動,比如輔導孩子完成各種學習任務以及PPT,頻繁參加家長會運動會以及學校的各種活動。由老人帶孩子的養育方式也開始逐漸被質疑,這使得一部分中國女性在經濟條件允許的情況下更傾向自己帶孩子。

      另一方面,由于中國城市人口老齡化的加劇,老人照看孫輩也變得有心無力。數據顯示:2016年,中國65歲以上老齡人口約為1.5億,占總人口的比例達到10.8%。以上海常住人口為例,60歲以上人口占總人口的比例超過27%,70歲以上人口的比例達到了12%,而大城市適齡人群又普遍晚婚,伴隨著二孩的到來,很多人的父母身體情況已無法再幫助照顧下一代。

      此外,二胎政策的開放以及迅速增長的育兒嫂工資,也讓越來越多的中國女性傾向于放棄工作,留在家里全職照顧孩子。在北京,2004年一名月嫂的工資大約是每月2000到2,500元人民幣,如今月嫂的每月工資就已達到7,000至10,000元(甚至更高),其工資漲幅為350%至400%,堪稱中國房價之外漲幅最快的一個行業。優秀育兒嫂的月薪也早已超過普通都市白領的收入水準,這也令不少父母望而卻步。

      一面是隨著中國社會的發展而日漸壯大的全職主婦大軍,另一面卻是社會輿論依然在宣揚傳統落后的舊觀念,認為全職主婦是不學無術的黃臉婆與社會寄生蟲,對全職主婦呈現出一面倒的唱衰聲音,這實在是一個非常奇怪的現象。

    全職主婦VS.職場女性:沒有可比性

      事實上,當社會輿論依舊停留在主張“女性不應為了家庭犧牲自我”的時候,越來越多的中國女性已然在徘徊猶豫糾結中做出了自己的選擇,清楚地知道了自己真正想要的到底是什么。

      大約十年前,身邊有這樣一位朋友,碩士畢業后,在美國順利找到了一份年薪十萬美元的工作,算不上多,但亦是不少的一份收入,至少養活自己是沒問題的。可后來她懷孕了,由于學的是工科,所從事的工作對腹中的胎兒而言有一定的危險系數,在調換工作崗位無望的情況下,她毅然辭掉了工作。用她的話說:錢掙多少都掙不完,可如果孩子出了問題,那是一輩子的事。

      就在前不久,在國內也親眼目睹了身邊一位職場女性放棄了令人羨慕的工作,獨自帶著兩個年幼的孩子移民加拿大。她已經在外企身居高位,一年的收入少說也有200萬人民幣,如今和公司協商出國后改為兼職做項目,收入肯定比之前少,風光程度也不可同日而語。但經過綜合考慮,想到老公的收入亦非常可觀,足夠養家,她最終還是認為應該把孩子的教育成長放在第一位。

      這樣的選擇也令她們贏得了另一半和周圍很多人的喝彩和尊重。毋庸置疑,在目前中國法律對全職主婦保護尚不健全的情況下,中國女性放棄工作回歸家庭,在婚姻的兩性關系中,其實有著一份類似在酒桌上“我干了,你隨意”的肝膽相照般的勇氣與義氣,這份義氣理應得到保護,而非被歧視與譴責。

      事實上,無論是職場女性還是全職主婦,無論是拿著每個月幾千元錢,每天晃晃悠悠去單位“點卯報到”“例行公事”,還是斷然放棄高薪回家照顧孩子,都是女性在反復權衡后做出的謹慎抉擇,各有各的苦衷,很難說哪一個決定就一定更英明,哪一個角色就更值得尊重。

    主婦的過錯還是社會環境的滯后?

      關于全職主婦這一社會角色,電視劇《我的前半生》中傳達了這樣兩點信息:1.全職主婦在婚后兩性關系中處于被動地位,經濟沒有保障。2.全職主婦在家中無所事事,只知道“買買買”,相比之下,職業女性更可愛。于是乎眾人紛紛得出結論:還是出去工作好。

      而這恰恰反映了社會環境尚沒有跟上時代發展的腳步。首先是社會保障體系的滯后,同世界上其他國家相比較,中國法律在經濟方面,特別是離婚時,對全職主婦嚴重缺乏保護。其次是落后的陳腐觀念,認為全職主婦“不學無術”,沒有創造價值,是社會的寄生蟲。而現實中的全職太太,基本全都是奔回家去救火,整日忙的團團轉,一點都不悠閑。

      就這點而言,不能因此就逼迫中國女性一定要咬牙硬挺著奔波于職場,僅僅為了迎合落后的社會輿論,以及在婚姻中留一條所謂的“后路”,而應該反過來重新審視中國社會相關的法律法規,是否需要根據需要而不斷改進日益健全?同時,對全職主婦的勞動與貢獻也應做出更加客觀公正的評價。

      全職主婦在世界很多國家其實早已是一種非常普遍的現象,如今,中國女性也多了這樣的一種選擇,而非只能義無反顧地在職場廝殺,這不失為一種社會進步。甚至,隨著社會的發展,在女性養家糊口綽綽有余的情況下,出現大規模“家庭煮夫”群體也不是沒有可能。

      也許,當某一天,人們無論看到“全職主婦”還是“全職煮夫”的時候,都見怪不怪,不再非議,而他們的勞動價值被充分肯定,他們的權益也得到法律的捍衛保護,就意味著中國社會進入了一個更加健康和諧的階段。

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